So to most people, giving up shopping for a month is not a big deal. But to someone whose social calendar is defined by visiting certain malls at certain times of the month it was a HUGE deal. I gave up shopping for a month and this is what I’ve learnt.
I have a SERIOUS spending problem- For the first week and a half, it felt like I was going to go crazy. It was like I had an itch that I could not scratch. I needed to shop and I needed to do it NOW! Eventually I got used to not treating myself but it was sobering how much I felt like I NEEDED to spend money.
I found other ways to “treat” myself- Instead of spending money as a treat, I had home spa days or movie nights. I found a way to enjoy myself without involving my wallet.
SO MANY CLOTHES- One of the reasons why I felt like I was going crazy during that first week was because we had family functions to attend and I had nothing to wear. No pretty dress. No pretty bag and nothing in my closet fit! I don’t even remember what I ended up wearing but I do remember that the night was amazing. Also, when I felt frustrated and went shopping in my own cupboard, I found so many great items that I had never worn before. In fact my co-workers thought that I had gone shopping when I had simply just gone through my cupboard.
I found extra cash- I was very surprised when at the end of the month, I found that I still had R300. Well done, Me
Have you ever gone on a shopping ban? Would you ever consider it? Let me know below.
Okay I know I haven’t been putting 100% into the blog but I have a really good reason.
I’ve finally completed my Digital Marketing course. So now I have a degree in English and Criminology as well as a Digital Marketing certificate (and I’m still not being hired by either of those fields but okay).
Anyway I was so excited to finally finish my studying. I always thought I would never be able to study on my own without the support of lecturers but I did! It actually feels like I can do anything!
In other bookish news, I’ve stopped buying books (no really I have).
I joined Scribd which is like an online library of ebooks and audiobooks.
They have every book I’ve been interested in so it’s definitely going to be a while before I purchased new reads (my wallet and my falling shelves are both very grateful).
Anyway all of this is to say that I will be back publishing regular content soon.
Last week Saturday, my family and I received news that my dad was turned down for a job.
It was pretty startling since it was made to seem as if the job was 100% certain. The company made travel plans and accommodation arrangements for him. Now they were saying they thought it over and did not actual require a manager.
I dealt with this in a very mature fashion. I went to my bed and stayed there for half an hour.
I felt numb and in shock. Did I read the signs wrong? Why would you talk about travel and accommodation plans if you are NOT hiring? What on Earth had happened?
Finally once I was done moping I decided to reorganise my vanity cupboard and sort out my scarves for winter. I told myself this was fine. Sure, my dad didn’t have a new job but he still had his current job.
I knew the company he worked at was closing but that was in a few months So he just had to look for something within the next two to three months. No biggie.
The Tuesday after this, the company my dad worked at, sent out their official communication that they were closed.
It was like a very cruel prank. This was the one thing I was depending on.
Here’s the thing. I come from a family of three. As in me, my mother and my father.
My mother is medically boarded and I am still in pretty early stages of my career. Basically my father’s the main earner in the house. (Also can I just say how pathetic my story sounds? Boohoo my dad has no job and my mother has Lupus. I could cringe just thinking about it).
If there is one thing my epic magazine failure (yes, going to an interview and deeming the industry as dying is definitely an epic failure in my books) taught me, it is that you should cry. Cry a river if you feel like it would make you feel better. But after that, build a bridge and get over it.
The parents and I sat down. Drew up a budget. Inside, a part of me died. There is one thing we did not address in our family budget. One unspoken but very critical rule.
The shopping would need to stop.
I love shopping. It makes me feel better. I have a stressful job and shopping is my way of fixing it. Could I really give it up? (Spoiler Alert: It is really looking like I can).
So we decided on who would cut out which spending and replace it with paying an account. All was good.
Then my dad’s side job as a driver fell through. At this point I feel like I’m living in my own “A Series of Unfortunate Events”. It is kind of amusing though. Anything that can go wrong is going wrong
So why am I sharing this?
At some point in the distant or not too distant future, I want to look back at this and say “hey remember that time your dad lost his job and you had to change your spending habits? You say you couldn’t but you did!”
Or even “remember that time everything was going wrong and it was so bad it was funny? It will just be nice to look back and say “I made it. Even when I thought I couldn’t.
There has been several times when I was like “nope, I can”t do this. I will not do this” but I got through it fine.
Like my final of year of college when the campus was on fire and I had to skip classes because my Criminology module clashed with English. Then there was that time I was convinced I would never get a job because I was scared to speak on the phone (hello, I now work in a call center).
You never really know what you can and can’t do until you have actually tried to do it.
I feel like I haven’t been blogging as much as I would like. Life has been getting in the way but there’s been lots of exciting things happening so I thought I would do a quick life update.
Firstly, I finally got a job! I feel like I’ve been searching forever so you guys have no idea how thrilled this makes me. I also graduated. Which, while exciting, left me a bit disappointed since it turns out that my degree was literally a piece of paper. Can no one give me a degree on like a solid piece of cardboard?
I’m glad that after years of effort, I finally got the degree in English that I’ve always wanted. It also doesn’t hurt that I will no longer have to wake up at 5AM to attend a class that may be cancelled due to a student protest or just cut short by a tired lecturer.
I’ve also been stockpiling books (who’s surprised? No one? Yeah, that’s what I thought). I don’t have that much time to read anymore but I just like having the books nearby. I’m going to share a recent bookhaul soon.
What have you been up to in April? What are your plans for the long weekend? I’d love to know below.
I know I haven’t really blogged much lately and I feel horrible about it. The WordPress app on my phone wasn’t working and I was too busy at college to get to a computer and blog. Ironically now that I do have free time, my university is on a strike. I swear I will try and make time to blog more frequently once everything calms down.
It seems like everyone and their mother has an opinion on what I should do once I graduate. So far, none of those opinions have included or required any of my input. And all this unsolicited advice seems to go along the same route- basically everyone wants me to go do postgraduate studies.
Which would be great if a) it was something I wanted to do or even if b) People would suggest postgraduate studies instead of simply telling me “you should go do Honours”.
I’ve always known that I wanted to be a journalist which is why I chose to major in Journalism. People just seem to ignore that and it is seriously pissing me off. Which brings me to my next issue with postgraduate studies. If I was to study further, I would prefer to do my Honours in English Studies. I would also prefer to study all the way until PhD so that I can lecture in a university-level English classroom. However that is more of a back-up plan than a goal. Like I’ve said so many times since I was twelve, journalism is the career I want. And like people have done so many times since I was twelve, my decision is being ignored.
My question is this, when did society decide what we can and cannot do? I am sick and tired of being considered odd simply because I don’t follow the stereotypes of what society expects us to do. I’ve seen friends complain about how people expect them to marry and have kids. Like postgraduate studies, starting a family is a great idea if it’s what you want. I remember being totally shocked when an old friend got married at the age of twenty. However my shock quickly melted away when I remembered that she always had been the mother of our friend group. Marriage would certainly suit her. However when other people found out (okay I couldn’t resist bragging that I had grown up with someone who was now getting married), I remember someone asking me if she was pregnant.
Last I checked, everyone had a life of their own. Why don’t we all focus on living our own lives instead of dictating how people live theirs? Some people want to get married, some people want to study, some people want to go start their own business. Unless their plans somehow seriously harm you, I really don’t see what the big deal is.
If we all followed the same life path, we would essentially be copies of each other and what would be the fun in that? People need to step back and allow others to do what makes them happy instead of what they think society would have wanted them to do.
There’s always been much for me to worry about as a second-semester senior even without actually being a second-semester senior.
I’m supposed to update my resume, start the job search, make a final decision on whether or not I’m pursuing postgraduate studies (and if so, in which of my two majors would I continue studying?). However the day before my 21st birthday, the driver of my liftclub altered my second-semester to-do list. He announced to us that he would be getting a new job and we needed to find new transport.
Most liftclubs take new members at the beginning of the year so I knew that finding a new liftclub would be difficult. Another thing that worried me was that in my first liftclub, the people delighted in making me miserable. I would even go as far as to say that they were bullies. The end result of their horrid ways was that I left the liftclub as well as my “friends” from high school (Life Lesson: It’s important to know the difference between “friends” and Friends. Sometimes it may take an unpleasant experience to learn the difference but you’ll be better off in the end).
After much searching I did find a liftclub. And boy was it majorly different from both my first liftclub and the second. The people were so friendly I couldn’t help but be suspicious. (So much so that I eventually broke down one day in tears because I had no idea how to respond to them and worried that they would think I was being rude). This liftclub was also huge- with about thirty people. I also no longer needed to wake up at 5AM and was home immediately after my class.
However everything has a downside and for my liftclub the downside is the van. On the first day of campus I opened the van door, only for it to close on me.
On day two, there was a different van with a faulty door that didn’t open unless you put in alot of strength.
I don’t have alot of strength.
As far as downsides go, these aren’t so bad. It sucks that I’m still so terrified of the people in my new liftclub turning out to be as horrible as the ones in my old liftclub. Especially since these people have been nothing but pleasant to me. However try as I might, I really can’t let go of the past.
This month was really great for me since I purchased signed copies of Lady Midnight and the Creepy Hollow series (which was on sale for R20 EACH!!!). I also found the last Vampire Diaries book and my father bought me the remaining three books pictured above for my birthday.
I also won a Me Before You hamper from Penguin Books South Africa. I don’t have the book though so that’s a mistake that needs to be fixed immediately.