Excuse me while I hide out in my pillow fort…forever

Last week Saturday, my family and I received news that my dad was turned down for a job.

It was pretty startling since it was made to seem as if the job was 100% certain. The company made travel plans and accommodation arrangements for him. Now they were saying they thought it over and did not actual require a manager.

I dealt with this in a very mature fashion. I went to my bed and stayed there for half an hour.

I felt numb and in shock. Did I read the signs wrong? Why would you talk about travel and accommodation plans if you are NOT hiring? What on Earth had happened?

Finally once I was done moping I decided to reorganise my vanity cupboard and sort out my scarves for winter. I told myself this was fine. Sure, my dad didn’t have a new job but he still had his current job.

I knew the company he worked at was closing but that was in a few months So he just had to look for something within the next two to three months. No biggie.

The Tuesday after this, the company my dad worked at, sent out their official communication that they were closed.

It was like a very cruel prank. This was the one thing I was depending on.

Here’s the thing. I come from a family of three. As in me, my mother and my father.

My mother is medically boarded and I am still in pretty early stages of my career. Basically my father’s the main earner in the house. (Also can I just say how pathetic my story sounds? Boohoo my dad has no job and my mother has Lupus. I could cringe just thinking about it).

If there is one thing my epic magazine failure (yes, going to an interview and deeming the industry as dying is definitely an epic failure in my books) taught me, it is that you should cry. Cry a river if you feel like it would make you feel better. But after that, build a bridge and get over it.

The parents and I sat down. Drew up a budget. Inside, a part of me died. There is one thing we did not address in our family budget. One unspoken but very critical rule.

The shopping would need to stop.

I love shopping. It makes me feel better. I have a stressful job and shopping is my way of fixing it. Could I really give it up? (Spoiler Alert: It is really looking like I can).

So we decided on who would cut out which spending and replace it with paying an account. All was good.

Then my dad’s side job as a driver fell through. At this point I feel like I’m living in my own “A Series of Unfortunate Events”. It is kind of amusing though. Anything that can go wrong is going wrong

So why am I sharing this?

At some point in the distant or not too distant future, I want to look back at this and say “hey remember that time your dad lost his job and you had to change your spending habits? You say you couldn’t but you did!”

Or even “remember that time everything was going wrong and it was so bad it was funny? It will just be nice to look back and say “I made it. Even when I thought I couldn’t.

There has been several times when I was like “nope, I can”t do this. I will not do this” but I got through it fine.

Like my final of year of college when the campus was on fire and I had to skip classes because my Criminology module clashed with English. Then there was that time I was convinced I would never get a job because I was scared to speak on the phone (hello, I now work in a call center).

You never really know what you can and can’t do until you have actually tried to do it.

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